21 Comments
User's avatar
Ali's avatar

ā€œI still care for my body, but I’m no longer trying to fix it,ā€ is something I'm going to carry with me for a long time.

Expand full comment
Wax's avatar

This brought me to tears. Remembering my own births and recoveries. And subsequent PPD. It is so true. Thank you for making this free so more people can read it. I do a lot of birth and post partum education and woild love your permission to share this broadly. Thank you both for speaking so compassionately about postpartum, and ~ with a realness that is often missed. Ugh. I need to read this again. šŸ’“

Expand full comment
Jessica Slice's avatar

I'm so glad it meant something to you!

Expand full comment
Virginia Sole-Smith's avatar

Yes absolutely, share away!! šŸ’œ

Expand full comment
Oona Hanson's avatar

Such a great episode. The way Jessica spoke about the postpartum period really resonated. It's wild how our society puts so much pressure on moms to "bounce back." I guess it's serving the goal of keeping our attention focused on the individual and bootstrapping rather than the reality of disability and the lack of community care/support.

I loved the way Jessica explored the way diet/wellness culture tries to bamboozle us into thinking we can cheat death if only we eat and move the "right" way.

Expand full comment
Julie's avatar

I loved this interview so much. It was very thought-provoking and perspective-shifting. Many "a-ha" moments for me while reading. Thank you, Virginia, for bringing us voices and stories like this! And thank you, Jessica, for sharing your story. I look forward to reading your book!

Expand full comment
Becky Karush's avatar

I love this interview very very much.

Expand full comment
Melissa Wells's avatar

Very interesting interview, I’ll have to read her book. My husband became disabled- he’s a triple amputee in power wheelchair in 2023. I definitely hate the ā€œI owe it to my kids..ā€ mentality. My husband will never again run around with our children or climb on the jungle gym, but that doesn’t mean he has failed as a parent or is not giving them what they ā€œdeserve.ā€

Expand full comment
Virginia Sole-Smith's avatar

100% percent!!

Expand full comment
Carmel's avatar

We just went to London earlier this month and saw Matilda at the Cambridge theater. My kids are and I obsessed with it too! My youngest has started playing ā€œTellyā€ every night before bed. šŸ˜‚

We just read the book before our trip and there is definitely more fatphobia in the book than the musical. Weirdly, I still haven’t watched the movie version.

Expand full comment
Aimee's avatar

I just finished this book on Tuesday. So fortuitous!

Expand full comment
Summers, Mary E's avatar

Yes. Also loved. Thanks to both of you!

Expand full comment
k10bd's avatar

I'm going to be thinking about this one for a long time too. I saw the title and honestly had questions, but I should have trusted they'd be answered well, and the were

Expand full comment
Lindsay Negrello's avatar

When V quoted J and then responded: "ā€œBecoming disabled dismantled something corrosive about my perfectionism.ā€ That one resonates."" YES! A change that isn't wanted is so hard and so scary, but it does force one to let some things fall by the wayside.

Expand full comment
ElizabethRoseG's avatar

Thank you for another brilliant interview!

Expand full comment
Breezle's avatar

This is so so good and important. Thank you both. I’m looking forward to reading the book!!

Expand full comment
Eleanor Burke's avatar

I can’t stop thinking about that the disabled people handled the transition to parenthood/newborn care better than their able bodied peers.

AND of course! The abilities so often taken for granted by many of us are often rapidly stripped away - housebound, physically constrained, a diminished sense of ā€œfreedomā€ etc once a baby is born.

Thank you for this wonderful conversation.

Expand full comment
Diana Fox Tilson, LICSW's avatar

This was so comforting. I wish I'd had this perspective on parenting when my first kid was born. I'm definitely going to read the book.

Expand full comment
Jessica Slice's avatar

Thank you, Diana

Expand full comment
Diana Fox Tilson, LICSW's avatar

You and your husband seem so fun and relaxed. (I absolutely love that he's listening to the songs from Mathilda in his free time. šŸ˜„) It made me think about how I might cultivate a more chill vibe with my kids. Since my oldest was born in 2015, I have always felt so much pressure to do parenting right, to not fuck it up, to optimize everything. I have evolved and let go of some of that, but not nearly enough, I realized, and that anxiety and pressure sets a tone for them. I have also become increasingly disabled over the past ten years and feel a lot of guilt about that, like I was failing them with my mobility limitations. The whole family has to accommodate me because I'm the most limited member. This is sadly the only interview I've ever heard about parenting that made me think I might not need to feel bad about that.

Expand full comment
Jessica Slice's avatar

What a thoughtful and honest comment. Thank you, Diana. That all sounds so familiar! We are given so many messages about how we _should_ be parenting. I am sorry you've been feeling so much guilt.

Expand full comment