Hi Virginia, I was loving this conversation, as a 48 year old in a bigger body with a 74-year-old mother who is on a perpetual diet. And then I read this: "It’s like, you’ve given up some relevancy by becoming a mom, right? Even though you’ve obviously had sex to become a mom, you are somehow now not a sexual being, not desirable because…
Hi Virginia, I was loving this conversation, as a 48 year old in a bigger body with a 74-year-old mother who is on a perpetual diet. And then I read this: "It’s like, you’ve given up some relevancy by becoming a mom, right? Even though you’ve obviously had sex to become a mom, you are somehow now not a sexual being, not desirable because you’re a mother." I had to stop reading. This is heterosexist. It's exclusionary. It makes adoptive parents invisible. And the rest of the sentence is so true, but there are so many ways to become a mother that have nothing to do with having sex. Sigh.
Heather, thank you -- you are absolutely right. I was speaking specifically to the experience of pregnancy and post-partum bodies and how we demonize that particular kind of "mom body." But I should have chosen my words much more carefully and also acknowledged that folks who become moms without having sex also experience a lot of these same body pressures. I really appreciate this note.
Hi Virginia, I was loving this conversation, as a 48 year old in a bigger body with a 74-year-old mother who is on a perpetual diet. And then I read this: "It’s like, you’ve given up some relevancy by becoming a mom, right? Even though you’ve obviously had sex to become a mom, you are somehow now not a sexual being, not desirable because you’re a mother." I had to stop reading. This is heterosexist. It's exclusionary. It makes adoptive parents invisible. And the rest of the sentence is so true, but there are so many ways to become a mother that have nothing to do with having sex. Sigh.
Heather, thank you -- you are absolutely right. I was speaking specifically to the experience of pregnancy and post-partum bodies and how we demonize that particular kind of "mom body." But I should have chosen my words much more carefully and also acknowledged that folks who become moms without having sex also experience a lot of these same body pressures. I really appreciate this note.