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As someone new to gardening, I feel very much like I am going to have to work at constantly reminding myself this is not an all or nothing pursuit. I can stop or change my mind, I can not do something...there can be so much pressure to have things be perfect and none of the pretty garden videos on IG say how much work it can be!

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Yes, it is VERY hard for those of us with perfectionistic tendencies not to bring that here and feel pressure to do all the things!! And that sucks the joy out so fast. It really helps me to keep a running list of all the projects IтАЩd *like* to do and then pick like one or two per season and just trust the others will happen in some future year. (If I still want them to тАФ some of the ideas I had for this garden in the first few years no longer make sense/interest me!)

And also to remember, gardening shouldnтАЩt feel like itтАЩs us vs nature, itтАЩs a way of having more connection with nature so weeds and wildness and messy parts are all part of it.

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As a recovering perfectionist, I've found gardening to be sooooo helpful for this very reason. It's slow, it does its own thing, some stuff will work out better than I could have planned, some things are eaten by slugs.

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Love that framing!

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I just discovered beer traps for slugs. They freakin' WORK! You just take a couple tuna or cat food cans, set them in the soil so the top is level with the soil, fill it about 1/2 way with beer. Slugs like the smell of the yeast and sugar and will crawl in, and then get too drunk to get out and drown. They're effective to about a 3 foot radius.

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When life makes it so I can't tend to my garden as much as I like and it gets messy, I just say I'm going for "goblin-core" or a haunted garden. And later, when I feel more organized, I can get back to tending it and change it again.

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All my gardener friends say the beginning is just about low pressure and seeing what lives. IтАЩm taking that advice. Just simple stuff and seeing what does well where in the garden.

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Like the great Anne Helen Peterson says, weeds are not a moral failing. Repeat as needed. тЩея╕П

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I love this!! It's hard not to think we have to have perfect attunement and for me, having it all done now! The love of gardening is planting what you like, checking in on it the next couple of years, then transplanting lots of stuff because it's bigger or brighter or for whatever reason would look better over there!! That' gardening. Just what Virginia is doing!

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My gardening philosophy comes from my mom тАФ we both are over-thinkers with perfectionist tendencies, but the garden is one place where our priority is to be able to relax and enjoy the process. ItтАЩs been a journey for me of anxiously asking her questions (sheтАЩs an amazing gardener) but IтАЩve come to realize that if IтАЩm stressed about planting a ton of new things/maintaining my garden, IтАЩm doing too much! ItтАЩs really helped me to keep it as a restorative environment for practice, playing in the dirt, and enjoying that plants love you back when you put time into them.

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I love that!

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