The Anti-Diet Flu Survival Guide

Because January.

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Well if you’ve been following along at home, we kicked off January with one kid testing positive for Flu B. Then I was for sure sick for five days, despite never testing positive for anything. We had less than a week of both of us recovering and then, bam—this weekend, the other kid came down with Flu A. (Why are there two kinds of flu? Who signed off on this bullshit!) I’ve been fielding texts from at least half my mom friends about similar winter illness sagas — and norovirus is also having a real moment,

Corinne Fay

reports from New Mexico?! What a time to be alive.

So why an anti-diet guide to surviving the flu? Because winter illness/diet culture is very much a thing! The Internet is full of claims like “ob*sity impairs your immune response to the flu” (eye roll), as well as overhyped lists of foods you must and must not eat while you’re sick, and a lot of strong feelings about zinc. And the wellness-culture-to-anti-vax pipeline is very real, so wading even tentatively into those waters can land you in a Facebook mom group fervently arguing that Tamiflu is poison, fast.

Today’s newsletter is absolutely not intended to be medical advice of any kind. (Though I will say, anecdotally, I’ve been super grateful for our Tamiflu prescriptions, and for our flu shots, which may not have prevented transmission this year, but certainly helped keep our cases mild enough to manage at home.) But I do have a few hacks and recs, which I’ve collected over 11 years of surviving winter illnesses in the parenting trenches. They are all 100 percent diet culture-free—and also Amazon-free, since I’m getting through this current round of sickness in the midst of our No Amazon January.

Here’s what’s saving me this month…

1. At-Home Flu Tests

I have been saying this since mid-pandemic: I do not understand why we can’t test for alll the winter viruses in one go at home, before we drag germy kids (or our germy selves) to sit breathing all our germs around a doctor’s office. Behold! This year there are finally covid/flu combo tests available for home use. (Thank you to

Melinda Wenner Moyer

for alerting our mom group chat to this vital info!) It was so helpful to know right away we were dealing with flu, both for quarantine purposes and to fast-track us to that Tamiflu prescription. (In the first case, our pediatrician did still want to see our child in the office, but the next time, I was able to say “second kid down!” and get the script called in over the phone on a Sunday morning. My own doctor was also happy to do it that way and save me the office visit.)

2. Masks

Super obvious, and, I’ll admit, kind of triggering to pull back out! But masks are a cheap, easy way to attempt virus containment. My strategy is to keep the sick child quarantined in their room and mask up whenever I go in, as well as when I’m washing their used dishes or cleaning up (sorry tmi!!) vomit-covered surfaces of any kind. I also wash my hands obsessively and am running our air purifiers and HVAC fans since we can’t open windows.

3. The Sanitation Cycle on My Washer/Dryer

See above re: vomit-covered surfaces. My washer and dryer both have sanitation settings, but if yours doesn’t, this just means running them on the highest possible heat for roughly 2 hours each, so you could easily achieve that with repeated regular hot cycles.

4. Lasagna Sheets

I perfected this protocol during the potty training years, but it sure is handy for protecting your mattresses from 3 am vomit situations too:

1. Buy several packs of these disposable bed mats.

2. Apply one or two bed mats to the bare mattress (depending on size).

3. Cover with a washable waterproof mattress cover.

4. Top waterproof mattress cover with at least one more disposable bed mat.

5. Cover all of that with a fitted sheet.

6. Top the fitted sheet with another disposable bed mat.

7. Repeat steps 3-6.

Yes, I know that sounds excessive but in my experience, neither bed mats nor waterproof pads are ironclad at catching everything, especially as kids shift around and sleep in weird positions, and puke goes wherever the hell it wants. Now if there’s a middle of the night gross bed situation, I only need peel off the soiled layers and can trust there will be a clean surface under there somewhere for my kid to go back to sleep on, without me having to fully re-make a bed or find clean sheets at 3am.

5. All of the Vick’s Vapo Things.

I’ve talked before about loving the Vick’s shower tablets. If you have a kid who freaks out about their stuffy nose, but also resists obvious solutions (tissues, nasal sprays), these Vick’s Children’s VapoPatches can really help them smell something, which at least calms them down while the other meds kick in.

6. No Screen Limits

Truly how did parents survive kid illness without tablets? I’ve become increasingly relaxed about screentime in general (well I’m working on it!!!) but I absolutely lean in during sick weeks. For myself too; I’m binging Schitt’s Creek with my 11-year-old right now and wow did Moira Rose get us through a sick Sunday. Also, having kids old enough to text when they need something is a game-changer; toddler parents, it gets better.

7. Gallons of Tea

Whenever I get sick, I lose my voice, thanks to some #blessed combination of asthma, acid reflux, a high voice-demand job, and sheer genetic luck. I was on the verge last weekend, but a friend made me pot after pot of tea using this rough recipe, and it never fully disappeared:

• 1 clove garlic, minced

• 1 inch fresh turmeric, grated

• 1 inch fresh ginger, grated

• Handful of lemongrass leaves and stalks

• Pinch of oregano

• Splash of apple cider vineger

• 1-2 squirts of lemon juice

• Honey, to taste

Steep everything except the honey in hot water for four minutes, then strain out solids (we made it in a French press to make this easy!). Add as much honey as you want to your mug.

8. No Guilt About Movement

All of this sickness (and the accompanying sleep disruptions) for sure has me off my usual workout routine. And I’ve been stressing about that not at all, which is new and freeing! On days I’ve had a little more energy, I’ve gone for

Anna Maltby

’s Pilates workouts and her bare minimum workout, which you can do in literally 5 minutes. They are enough to keep my back from getting cranky, because the last thing I need is to be shepherding my household through the flu with my back out.

9. Cozy Puzzles

I can’t remember which beloved puzzling friend sent me this Jane Austen beauty, but it has been just the thing for my brain this month. Pair with a comfort show, podcast or audiobook and that tea. Nap as needed.

10. All the Comfort Food

Yesterday, my 7-year-old texted from her sick bed: “I am hungry for a brownie.” She had barely eaten in 24 hours, so I absolutely dropped everything to make a batch of the world’s best brownies. There have been times when I’ve had a sick child desperate to eat something she wasn’t allowed to have for medical reasons and it was heartbreaking, so I was instantly relieved to realize that this month, germy as it is, has not been that. And then I had a moment of absolute gratitude that I could give my child this comfort without feeling stressed about sugar and calories.

What’s in your winter illness survival kit? I’d love to know!