107 Comments
Apr 11Liked by Virginia Sole-Smith, Corinne Fay

Sometimes I feel frustrated by how often I end up buying items in black, navy, or gray when I really love color. There are a few reasons for this - one, I have a limited budget and need to be able to maximize what goes with what. But second, I find I'm often unimpressed with the color choices available at the brands I shop. Where are all the shades of purple (not just "purple people" purple, I want eggplant, plum, and violet. ALSO I want cobalt blues, turquoise, sapphires, and rich teals... I want all the deep jewel tone colors in my basics. Not just black, gray, army green, and navy, with some weird pastel choices thrown in.

Maybe this is an issue with brands and budget for me. I know that it's much more difficult for manufacturers to dye clothes certain colors and that absolutely affects what's widely available and at what price.

Expand full comment
author

Yeah this is a bummer because what colors are manufactured are based on the Pantone colors of the year. So if that isn’t your vibe, you’re out of luck (reason 427 why getting your colors “done” doesn’t always work out). I wonder if you’d have more luck secondhand, although of course that comes with its own challenges.

Expand full comment
author

Oh that's fascinating and explains why I felt so out of sorts for years during the rein of mustard and terra cotta as "color."

Expand full comment
Apr 11Liked by Virginia Sole-Smith, Dacy Gillespie

So interesting! Now I need to read about Pantone...

I've tried a LITTLE bit of dyeing things, but I don't love the process. I've been considering getting a basic sewing machine (Joann's Fabrics is having a lot of sales rn because of their financial issues) and learning how to make some basic items. I'd think that I could have more access to wiser array of colors that way?? I wear a lot of t-shirt or sweatshirt dresses over leggings (I feel like a superhero in this outfit and also love not dealing with pants waistbands or the French tuck conundrum). At some point I'd love to learn how to make some simple items. Of course, that might not be cost and time effective... but it probably would be fun :-)

Expand full comment
author

There are a ton of sewists in the BT community (including Corinne who dabbles), I bet you'll hear from some folks with good tips!

Expand full comment

yes! this is a good idea :) Heartily encourage anyone to learn to sew, at the very least, so that they can make an informed decision about whether it's worth it for them.

Caveats: it doesn't save money lol. And, fabrics are also subject to color trends; this is one reason why some people have large fabric stashes! I have been known to buy lots of yardage when my colors are "in".

Expand full comment

If you do decide to buy a sewing machine make sure one of the accessories is a foot called a “walking foot”. It makes sewing knit fabrics much easier and eliminates a lot of issues that beginners struggle with. Also, sweatshirt dresses are basically extra long T-shirts with a few extra steps so if you learn to sew T-shirts you‘ll be 90% of the way to sewing your dresses as well. (Leggings are less forgiving and may take longer to master but can also be made on a sewing machine)

Expand full comment

Thank you! This is good advice

!! I have a very old sewing machine that belonged to my MIL (it's probably 40 years old) and it works ok until it doesn't :-). Lots of jamming. I haven't used it in ages for this reason and am considering buying a new one. Is there a brand you like best?

Expand full comment

On the under $200 end the only brand I recommend is Brother. If you’re willing to go up to around $500 then Jenome, Paff, Brother, Juki and Viking all make solid machines. I’d avoid Singer, there’s some okay machines but the brand quality is really inconsistent

Expand full comment
Apr 14·edited Apr 14

I love my Brother laser printer and my mom loved her Brother knitting machines, so that was actually what I've been gravitating towards. Thank you so much for the input!

Expand full comment

Funny that you should mention this. Last night I went to a poetry reading. My slacks were olive green, blouse a lighter shade of olive, overcoat olive and the break it up I wore a sleeveless white T under the open top. My friend committed on how lovely I look in that color. I laughed and said, "In 2022 this was the only color Banana Republic sold."

Expand full comment
founding
Apr 15Liked by Dacy Gillespie

Thank you for this comment! I too am on the hunt for color and am so bored by all of the black, navy, olive, white, & khaki/brown. I want my clothes to feel fun

Expand full comment

Ok, yes!! Glad I'm not alone.

Expand full comment
Apr 11Liked by Corinne Fay, Dacy Gillespie

Ooooooo. So many rules in my closet. Shirts must never be tucked. Tight knit shirts are only for when I’m a certain size. All shirts must hit my hips at a bare minimum. Can’t wear bright or colors on top AND bottom. No shorts. NO SHORTS AND SOCKS. And 100% NO SOCKS WITH SANDALS!!!!!

Picturing the summer outfit that willl break all of these now…and it both gives me a thrill and the heebiejeebies all at once!!

Expand full comment
author

Socks with sandals are sooooo comfy

Expand full comment

There’s no rationality to this rule! I look forward to trying it out! (Once I’ve gotten nonminimalist ones!)

Expand full comment
founding
Apr 11Liked by Dacy Gillespie, Corinne Fay

I’m here to support your socks and sandals journey! At least here in Colorado, where hiking sandals reign supreme, there’s whole shoulder season looks that demand a medium tall gym/hiking sock be worn with your chacos/tevas/birks. So comfy!

Expand full comment

And I’m IN COLORADO! Lol! I’m currently divesting from minimalist shoes and really need to go sandal shopping!

Expand full comment
founding

I’ve had good luck with Chacos and Birkenstocks on Poshmark if you can go try on and figure out your size and style options in store. (The toe-loop choice is very decisive lol) I love the Marine Layer Gym Socks for socks-and-sandals, they’re cute and pretty sturdy in both the men’s and women’s sections.

Expand full comment

I’ve always wanted a pair of birks (like since junior high when they weren’t possibly affordable to my family), so I’m planning on trying them out! And NO toe strap!!!! :D

Expand full comment
founding

Now you have me hoping for triumphant pictures!

Expand full comment

Might take longer than three weeks to find the right shorts but…I think I’m going to have to do this!!

Expand full comment
founding
Apr 11Liked by Dacy Gillespie, Virginia Sole-Smith, Corinne Fay

I am beyond excited to see 3 of my favorite and most trusted newsletter people creating a style challenge! I am so looking forward to listening later today! Thank you, thank you, thank you!

Expand full comment
author

😘

Expand full comment
Apr 11Liked by Corinne Fay, Dacy Gillespie

This is so great. This week Dacy helped me talk through the feelings that arose from what influencers say about the right way to shop, the right way to wear clothes, the right way to do a lot of the things we must do daily (clean our home, eat, etc.) After our conversation I felt liberated to unsubscribe to a slew of newsletters. The only people I feel comfortable with, liberated by, heard, safe are you, Dacy, Virginia, and Corinne and you're not influencers. I LOVE what you're doing here these next four weeks. (I'm trying not to give myself permission to buy the tent of a blue striped cotton dress currently in my cart, but you know what? You're not going to judge me if I do and I'm not going to feel guilty going completely out of my comfort zone and trying it. Who made the rule that everything in my closet must be tailored? Mom. And she's been dead for 16 years! AND I'm 65 and don't have to listen to my mother!) Anyway, I loved this segment. Thank you all for your creativity and fun fashion. I'll let you know if I buy the blue striped dress.

Expand full comment

Update: Blue stripe dress sold out. BUT there was a lovely white, 100% cotton, tall, tent-like dress that is also cute and outside my comfort zone so that went into my cart. Will sit on it until the 15th when the challenge begins and then decide. The combination natural fiber and tall is like a rhapsody.

Expand full comment
founding
Apr 12Liked by Virginia Sole-Smith, Dacy Gillespie

I feel like I just did this challenge on my own and I'm pretty happy about where I ended up. As a work-from-home mom of toddlers who also sometimes goes into the office, my rules were about not repeating outfits, but my comfort outfit was always in the wash because I would wear it immediately every time it was clean. So I examined my rule about duplicates of things I really like and realized that it has actually taken me a long time and a lot of NOs to find those pieces that really work for me. So I immediately decided that this is no longer just my comfort outfit, it's now officially my "daily uniform." I bought each of the pieces in almost every colour they come in and took everything else out of those drawers. On the days I go to the office or go out, I get to switch it up and wear something cute that I love from another section of my closet. But on days that I'm at home, shuttling kids, running errands, and inevitably getting yogurt or snot or whatever else on my shirt before 9am, I have taken the guess-work out of my mornings and it is such a relief. I still get to choose my colour mood (I did still buy some in black and gray) but I know that I'm going to be comfortable and functional and I'm not so concerned about stains on my "good clothes" anymore. Being a mom is a job! So it just makes sense that it would require a uniform. Now I just sincerely hope that they don't discontinue these items any time soon!

Expand full comment
author

THIS "Being a mom is a job! So it just makes sense that it would require a uniform". love it so much! Now you have to share with us exactly what your uniform is!

Expand full comment
founding
Apr 12Liked by Dacy Gillespie

At Costco as we speak in my Torrid pedal pusher length leggings with pockets, Ellos 30" t-shirt tunic (but Women Within 100% cotton 30" tunic is also in my closet), Evelyn bra (Evelyn & Bobbie), ModiBodi leak-proof underwear (cause, Mom...) and my Birkenstock Bend sneakers (cause it's too cold in Chicago for Birkenstock sandals yet).

Expand full comment
author

👏👏👏

Expand full comment
Apr 11Liked by Corinne Fay, Virginia Sole-Smith

I so deeply love this! I’m doing it too! Wide leg pants. Capris because my ankles are hot in the summer on my way to work, all of it, I am here for! I had a moment that made it so clear how nuts these rules are. We were admiring all the snazzy outfits our friends were wearing at a wedding and there was a woman in a loose suit having a great time and my husband said, “you’d look great in that” and I explained that I’m not allowed to wear that and he was so confused. So now I have a loose suit and man, is it comfortable! If ya gotta wear a suit, I mean. I know all of the stuff you do is amazing, but I love the joyous celebration of the fashion.

Expand full comment
founding

I love “joyous celebration of the fashion”!

Could you describe loose suit more? Sounds incredible!

Expand full comment
founding

Yes, please. I need more intel on the loose suit.

Expand full comment
Apr 11Liked by Virginia Sole-Smith, Corinne Fay, Dacy Gillespie

just gotta say everyone looks phenomenal and i am REALLY loving corrine's outfits. That knit top is FIRE.

Expand full comment
author

It's so good!

Expand full comment
founding
Apr 12Liked by Dacy Gillespie

The concept of doing “C work” just came back through my mind. This is a hard one as a perfectionist/A student/first daughter. It feels like an important piece of your conversation. Also, trying to think about this in terms of my clothes and closet. There may be the perfect white button down and I can research and try to find it…and in my closet I have two very comfy white button downs that I enjoy wearing. Loved your conversation and feeling really supported by the 3 of you!

Expand full comment
author

this makes me so happy!! ❤️

Expand full comment
founding
Apr 11Liked by Dacy Gillespie, Virginia Sole-Smith

For me, my safe outfit rotates seasonally but is always a combination of pieces that I don't feel compelled to change out of. Like after I try to wear the boxy linen dress for the 37th time and still don't feel ok, I change into my tank/leggings/cardigan bc it's my reliable outfit. I'm looking forward to this challenge and maybe even wearing that boxy linen dress next week. 😊 As a former honor roll student, I appreciate that this is structured in a way that won't make me feel like I'm failing if I don't do XYZ.

Expand full comment
author

Excited for you to wear the linen dress and/or decide you will never wear it!

Expand full comment
author

Exactly!

Expand full comment
founding
Apr 15Liked by Corinne Fay

I basically haven’t worn shorts since kindergarten because I thought I looked fat in them! Obviously didn’t come up with that idea on my own, but my family is/was all in on diet culture. At this stage in life I’m small fat, no longer have an active eating disorder, and feel healthy and confident most of the time. But at 47, as embarrassing as it is, I’m still terrified of shorts. And I’m always hot! I need help!!

Expand full comment
founding

I can so relate to this! I started wearing shorts maybe 2 summers ago and I am sad I waited so long. (I probably haven't worn shorts since high school.) It is a game changer in terms of being comfortable and cool in the heat. I think finding the right shorts is really important, and it did take a bit for me to find what was comfortable, had enough coverage, didn't contribute to thigh chafing, etc. I'm a small fat and 54 and extremely pale-- I used to get teased for being so pale (in the eighties glory days of tanning)-- so there were a lot of hurdles to overcome! But, I started slow by only wearing shorts in the house and worked my way up. I think it is honestly a matter of exposure therapy! LOL But I think you can do it!

Expand full comment
founding

Thank you so much for this Laura! I like the plan to start at home first! If you have any good shorts recs let me know.

Expand full comment
author

I love shorts and I think they look cool on EVERYBODY. You know what else looks good on everybody? Not being hot and uncomfortable!!!!

Expand full comment
founding

I started with the Just My Size Women's Plus Size Cotton Jersey Shorts, Pull-on Gym Shorts, 7" Inseam (I got mine through Amazon, but I think maybe Walmart sells them as well) around the house, then to the gym then in normal around-town ways. The black pair especially don't look super sporty if you are just wearing a regular tank or t-shirt and not a sport bra. They read as "normal" shorts. (I have no idea what that means exactly, but you might get the idea.) I sized up to get the fit I want. I'm usually a 1X (5'8, 16/18, older mama of 2 kids) but purchased the 2X. Then last year I decided I needed jean shorts. (Who am I even?!) American Eagle has a shocking number of styles and extended sizes in both jeans and jean shorts. Don't be intimidated by the teen vibe.

Expand full comment
author

I love how you gave yourself gentle baby steps to acclimate!

Expand full comment
founding

Love, love, love thank you

Expand full comment
founding
Apr 14Liked by Corinne Fay, Virginia Sole-Smith, Dacy Gillespie

What I love about this style activity is that it’s so flexible and supportive that I don’t feel shame or guilt for opting out. I’ve never participated in a style challenge or really subscribed to any fashion trend. I have had fashion trends thrust upon me (looking at you cold shoulder tops) because that’s all I could find to wear. I’ve always had my own personal style and not cared whether it was popular (because most of the time it’s not). So I love that some of my favorite people are doing this in a way that feels inclusive of me not doing it! 👊

Expand full comment
author

Awww absolutely!!

Expand full comment
author

Absolutely! We support you NOT doing it if that’s what’s best for you!

Expand full comment
Apr 13·edited Apr 13Liked by Virginia Sole-Smith

Am I the only one who is so excited that she pulled a ton of stuff out her closet three days early in search of the stuff that qualifies to meet the challenge? Oh, and bought a door hanging, full body mirror for pictures?

Expand full comment
author

Ahhh can’t wait!!

Expand full comment
founding

I had to pull my full-length mirror out of a closet! We put it away a few years ago when my baby was trying to use it to pull herself up to stand. Fun to have it out again with the support of this group :)

Expand full comment
founding
Apr 12Liked by Virginia Sole-Smith

About 25 min into this I had to stop at Target to get underwear for my daughter. It was a rare alone time for me where work wasn’t calling, so I did a little shopping for myself which included 2 horizontal striped shirts (finally!), 2 dresses, and a couple tshirts. I was proud of myself for not getting weird about sizes but instead going with what felt good on my body. I came away with some great pieces I’m excited to wear! And then resumed the episode to hear about challenging yourself not to shop. Oops! But it’s before the challenge, so doesn’t count, right? 😁

Expand full comment
author

There’s no “counting” bc there are no real rules here — you can shop if that’s fun and helpful! Excited to hear how you feel about those pieces.

Expand full comment
founding
Apr 11Liked by Corinne Fay

I’m in! Going to participate with my mama. Should be fun to have an “accountability buddy” in this context.

Expand full comment
author

I love the idea of having an accountability buddy for this and of it being your mom!!

Expand full comment
founding
Apr 11Liked by Corinne Fay, Dacy Gillespie

You all delight me every time. And this is the most gentle "challenge" ever. I'm musing on the idea of a "safe outfit," as I sit here in one of my 300 black shirts...I feel seen!

Expand full comment
author

🥰

Expand full comment
founding
Apr 11Liked by Virginia Sole-Smith, Corinne Fay

I relate on the crop tops, I wore a cropped sweater to dinner last week and I kept pulling on it what felt like every 2 minutes.

Expand full comment
author

NOT fun

Expand full comment
Apr 11Liked by Virginia Sole-Smith, Dacy Gillespie

It's annoying, because I actually really like an ALMOST cropped, boxy tee or sweater. I like the way it looks and the comfort of having more ease in the silhouette. But it's hard to find one that's the correct proportion or won't shrink! My solution has been to size up quite a bit on cropped items and see if that works.

Expand full comment