I Didn't Write About Taylor Swift
But I've got your Halloween links and more.
As you read this, I will (hopefully!) be turning the book manuscript in yet again to my editor. I know, I know, how am I not done already?! I turned the first draft in at the end of June. My editor and several carefully selected early readers (including Corinne!) gave me notes on that, and I turned a second draft in at the beginning of September. In the meantime, my team of amazing fact-checkers were digging away to find all of the mistakes in my reporting. Then my publisher’s copy editor took the second draft and found all of my thousands of grammatical errors (and just like, a congenital inability to alphabetize properly in my Notes & Sources?). My publisher’s lawyer did their review of the ms. And my sensitivity reader sent their (essential) notes.
So to make this third version of the manuscript, I’m reviewing all of the changes suggested by all of these smart people, and getting every last deleted comma and corrected quote and other teensy adjustment into one master word document. What I’m saying is, I am now dreaming in track changes.
I am somewhat horrified by it, but I also think this stage of the manuscript is arguably the most important. I’m writing a book about a controversial set of issues, and the “but what about health?” trolls (plus, just, men on the Internet) will be all too eager to rip to shreds. Accurate reporting and solid citations is how we fight that. I’m also writing a book where over 100 parents and kids shared with me some of the most vulnerable moments of their lives. It is a huge responsibility to try to tell their stories accurately and empathetically.
Anyway! Since I’m busy over here obsessing over how changing a “because” to an “and” might completely derail the meaning of a sentence in ways that might or might not destroy my credibility as an author, I didn’t have time to write something for you about Taylor Swift and her scale. Thank goodness, Amanda Kate Richards did though. And so did my girl Shira Rosenbluth (click for the whole thread):
If you’re struggling with this one, I’ll also refer you back to this piece, where we go into a lot of detail about how thin people with body image struggles can still perpetuate anti-fat bias.
Meanwhile! It’s time for a good, old-fashioned link roundup. And since Halloween is just days away, we figured the most useful theme for these links would be:
Why you should let your kids eat the damn candy. (And eat it yourself.)
Here’s how to stay sane about Halloween candy. This is the approach I still mostly follow, though as Corinne and I discussed last week, I’m even more laid back about post-Halloween candy management these days. We just eat it until we get bored of it, which seems to happen pretty quickly since nobody feels restricted about it in the first place.
That article also gets into why I’m not a fan of the Switch Witch, unless you have a child with allergies who is otherwise going to feel left out when it comes to a lot of Halloween candy. Otherwise you are just making your life too hard, as Amy Palanjian and I discussed in this episode.
Dietitian Julie Duffy Dillon agrees:
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More helpful tips from Anna Lutz RD and Elizabeth Davenport RD of Sunny Side Up Nutrition:
If you’re working through your sugar fears, here’s why sugar doesn’t cause hyperactivity or meltdowns (but saying things like “oh man, the sugar rush is hitting!” might). And here’s why sugar is not physically addictive.
I also love this breakdown from Diana K. Rice, RD:
In Non-Halloween News
I really, really want you to read “You Don’t Look Anorexic” by Kate Siber, from this weekend’s NYT Mag. I am so proud of my friends Sharon Maxwell and Shira Rosenbluth and all of the smart voices in this piece. And we need to keep challenging the life-threatening misconception that fat people don’t get eating disorders.
I also really, really want you to preorder Christy Harrison’s upcoming book The Wellness Trap. Yes, we are book birthday twins! And yes, hoping to do an event together, so stay tuned!
Amy Odell interviewed me on Back Row about Karl Lagerfeld, women’s magazines’ legacy and fashion’s eternal anti-fatness.
And I can’t stop thinking about The Unbearable Whiteness of the Local Food Movement by Anjali Prasertong.
Hooray Burnt Toast Giving Circle!
We raised $28,236 for the 2022 midterm elections in Arizona! The deadline was 10/17 at midnight, so any donations that come in now will go to the Rapid Response Fund to support quick-response work like last-minute electoral opportunities, ballot curing, helping with recounts, etc. These are no longer state-specific funds but they are amounts that are going out the door to help for 2022! If you haven’t joined us yet, I’d love you to support these crucial last minute efforts here.
In addition to being delicious, candy has been a great tool for my selective eating kids. They are more willing to try unfamiliar textures, appearances, and flavors when they’re in candy form! It’s really fun to sit around the table & try all the different candies & talk about them. I’m looking forward to the Halloween bounty this year.
I find myself most self-conscious around Halloween candy, of basically all food situations. I have fond memories of coming home, dumping all my candy out on the floor of our basement playroom, and just picking through it and eating whatever I wanted for what felt like HOURS, with my sisters. Probably it was like 30 minutes but man, the luxury of it - it really stands out in my mind!
I approach it the same with my own kids now and I try not to care but it is among the higher-feeling kid-food situations I find myself in. I find all these weird policing urges that I have to tamp down and silence - not even "how much" but also, like, HOW. Like my younger kid is a big sampler. He will open a lollipop and suck on it for 45 seconds and then open a tootsie roll and take a bite and then open another lollipop and suck on that one. And I have this weird compulsion to be like "don't open a second lollipop! you have that one right there!" like WHY DO I CARE. Why do I find myself wanting to make sure he eats this candy in a linear, logical, non-wasteful way? I do not generally feel this urge with their food - if he takes a bite of one chicken nugget and then takes a new bite of a fresh chicken nugget I don't even notice. It's like I have this really strongly internalized idea of the "right way" to over-indulge on candy? to savor it all, maybe? (all those women's magazines talking about indulging in a square of chocolate after dinner, really ENJOYING it, making it count? I'm just reaching, here.) I have no idea. Something in me has internalized this really negative feeling about the very bacchanalian-frenzy nature of Halloween that makes it so wonderful. My kid literally Scrooge McDucks around in his pile of candy like the big ol pile of gold coins, a lollipop sticking out of his mouth and an open candy bar in his fist, and like....for some reason that doesn't jibe with what "indulgence" should look like, in my mind, and it's hard for me to not-notice it.
Generally speaking my motto tends to be, "everything in moderation, even moderation." I live Halloween out according to that motto but it is one of the harder times I have as far as shucking off the cultural baggage and owning my approach. I have lots of well-meaning, intentional friends who do the Switch Witch and I mostly find myself just being quiet when that stuff comes up.